Twilightblue's Journal, 17 Jan 14

Because you really do want to, and Life does seem to sabotage us doesn't it. You have the right attitude, get back up, dust off the discouragement, and keep going. The only way you will fail is to stop trying. 

You can do it! Just jump back in and do it! Remember you are doing this for you so you can have a healthier life. Also the exercise can actually make your body younger! That's why I do just calorie count I can eat anything I choose and adjust but I give myself permission to skip those days when I'm out of town ie: daughters' where I cannot control some things and in the winter many times exercise is not an option. I also end up drinking beer with the whole gang down there. I just watch the portions and get back on track when I come home.  

Kinda what I do as well. Like I know next week I will blow it on Tuesday due to an ordered in lunch at work. I would skip but I want to try their food. I will just eat fewer calories a few other days in the week. I want to average no more than 1200. I I leave town for a few days I'll just make sure it's low for a week or 2 after.  

you said " A life of complete lock-down is not practical, and I can't manage to do a 'slight derailment'. I am now discouraged and frustrated and slightly depressed. Starting again today, but not sure why anymore." so you expect yourself to be perfect? (can't handle the 'slight derailment') -- why? no one is "perfect" crimeny I'd be in a boat load of trouble if I was supposed to be perfect life of lock down -- completely agree. Feeling like you're constantly depriving yourself sucks. not sure why you're bothering -- not sure why you wouldn't bother. Are you saying that you matter so little to yourself that you are writing yourself off as hopeless? Who was so mean to you when you were growing up that you think you are worthless, because I wanna take a road trip and go beat the crap outta that bully! 

Twilightblue, I'm with you, only mine is the fact that I'm on the road every other week and I've have to find a way to stay true to myself. Like the other comments, I've told myself that this is what I want and I'm doing it to please myself and I really don't care what other people think. I'm not going to binge just because everyone else is; I'm not going to have another drink just because everyone else is; I'm going to look at my hands each time they head for my mouth full of something and say, "Am I doing this for me or for someone else?" Other people will begin to realize what your goal is and to be supportive of you. Remember you are the one who is on the healthy lifestyle path and the rest of them will all be envious of your looks, beauty and figure. So let them suffer while you strut and I do mean that. Go look at yourself in the mirror and imagine the body you want and then go GET IT. For road trips, I have a variety of excuses which I use to tell the OTHERS why I can't join them for drinks, eat, etc. and the one that works best is simply to say, "That's not included in my current goals, so I'll take a raincheck this time and catch up with you later." Hang in there, you can do it, because it is something you want. It is something I want, and it is something the rest of us want. We are with you and support you in achieving this goal for yourself. 

Wow, thanks for all the comments guys! Now that I re-read it, boy does it sound like my own personal whine fest! I guess this is one way this site, and these journals are helpful. Never2old, you are right of course, changing my perspective and putting myself first will definitely go a long way to avoiding some of the pitfalls that might come along. HockeyGRRL, mostly good people surrounding me while growing up and minus the typical divorced parents Daddy issues I really can't put the blame anywhere but me, but you are right I am and really always have been super hard on myself. I loved your post your attitude is awesome, maybe I will try and adopt a little of it myself!Draglist and Wholefoodnut, the average of calories over time would help for sure, even if it just curbs the calories closer to my goals so I am not so overblown. Guesstimating is not my forte, for instance at my friends house having a piece of lasagna, even if I could accurately add up the calories per ingredient whipping out a food scale to weigh my food just seems over the top silly (I did not pack my food scale either)so its definitely a guessing game. Not the end of the world, but the discouragement is enough for me to keep the ball rolling, bad attitude and more bad choices, again I think changing my thought process will go a long way but easier said then done! Overall I am trying to make a lifestyle change not just a temporary "diet" so it all has to be worked out and addressed. Since my post on Friday (which did truly reflect how I was feeling)I am starting to feel better and I am going to just hope these hiccups become less and less until I wonder why I ever struggled at all. Wishful thinking, I hope not but only time will tell! Thanks everyone! 

Hey there, be kind towards yourself, but be honest. You're not going to be happy in this current state, so if you have to feel discomfort you might as well let it come from being disciplined and focused. This kind of pain at least has a great payoff of health and feeling good. I hope you choose the right kind of "pain". Good luck - you can do this if you want it bad enough.  

You have to be true to yourself, no one is going to be upset because you make different food, even at someone elses home. If they are so be it, be strong and if you want to have some of the other choices do it but just a little. Take a walk around the house, do some stuff in your bedroom before bed. I do 5 min routines right in front of the computer at Big John Drury on youtube. You will know you burned cals. Check it out. 

I'm REALLY happy you got everyones points because applying them WILL help you do better each time you THINK you fail.I agree with you that its the attitude that must change(Im guilty of falling prey to it at times as well) Try doing this: Each time you become aware of a negative,untrue or harmful thought IMMEDIATELY stop it from processing by saying aloud,THATS not true,& then ,aloud,relace it with the correct thought. When our ears hear what our mind thinks its easier to have the conviction. Its an *ongoing* process that if you KEEP at it,will become the lifesaver you're looking for. As with Bill(Draglist)click my buddy request :D We're here for ya!