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Life has been frustrating for me as of late, and I have tried to do my best to make the most of it, but it has started to get out of hand.
There are a lot of things that are making me frustrated, but in all reality the true reason is my low self-esteem and the need to be validated in some way. Combined with my current isolation, I moved out to this state with my friend who died soon after we moved, it is difficult to process these issues nor is it possible to find moral support.
With no friends or family to turn to, it leaves me in a lonely, insecure, and isolated place.
I keep trying knowing that I'll never have what I want if I simply lay over and concede defeat. I have made significant progress overall, but it seems so small when I look at where other people are in their lives. Co-workers that are physically fit and attractive with friends and families and social lives... while I am sitting here at a computer typing my woes. I threw away what would had been the best years of my life because I was shy and socially unaccepted. Life is cruel.
Logically I understand that I am not owed anything. I was dealt a hand and it is with that hand I must play. I keep drawing new cards in an attempt to replace some of my hand to at least build something to work with, but it'll never match some hands that others are dealt. Emotionally and spiritually, I cannot help but to believe that there is more to life than my pitiful existence, and that I just have to keep looking to eventually find it.
I will keep trying. It is all I can do.
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1468 kcal
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Fat: 86.58g | Prot: 154.39g | Carbs: 16.78g.
Breakfast: Nature's Best Perfect Zero Carb Isopure Whey Protein Isolate - Cookies & Cream. Lunch: A.1. Steak Sauces And Marinades A1 Steak Sauce, Pork Shoulder Roasts or Steaks (Boston Blade). Snacks/Other: Peanuts in Shell (Shell Not Eaten). more...
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3624 kcal
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Exercise:
Standing - 5 hours, Resting - 11 hours, Sleeping - 8 hours. more...
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 Comments
this moment, right now, it's all we have...stay strong and please keep trying, never give up.
11 Mar 16 by member: Nightwillow416
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Hey D1srupta, I hope you find what your purpose is and that there is more to life than constant drudgery...the last sentence you posted leads me to believe that you think that too. Wishing you well on your journey!!
11 Mar 16 by member: Steven Lloyd
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I am sorry you lost your friend and understand how difficult it is to make new friends when living in an unfamiliar area. Perhaps you could find some group support through a grief group, a spiritual community, or Meet Up Group. besy wishes, and you can always get support here with us.
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Welcome. Lots of help and friends here!
11 Mar 16 by member: SjF60
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Look... life is just what we make it. I am 57, a widow of just about a year, and a broken leg and had taken several MONTHS to heal because of my obesity. I have one thing to say to you- choose to have an adventure, or start a new and interesting hobby. Don't define yourself by being with someone, be yourself. I have about 18 months of hard work before I reach my goal weight, but I am okay with that. I also have plans, no matter how "socially unaccepted" some may think me to be. I am making plans to travel on my motorcycle. Mostly day trips, but a few weekends here and there. Why? Because I owe it to myself to enjoy my life and share human experience with others. Take a camera (yeah, I know... most folks have that in their phone), and go to a zoo, park, etc. Remember, be kind to yourself, and enjoy your life.
11 Mar 16 by member: tammiesatterfield
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You have done great so far.You lost all those pounds yourself.No one did it for you.So that is one step you are already succeeding in the right direction.The rest will come also .Love yourself and believe in yourself.I do understand how lonely and isolated you feel.Alot of the time I feel the same but just push on and look to tomorrow.
11 Mar 16 by member: UmmBilal
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D1srupta's Weight History
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