It's a very lonely road, mothering a special needs child. Hugs💙🙏💙🙏💙
09 Aug 23 by member: CrystalJo74
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(((HUGS))) I caught the devil with family when my Asperger's son was younger. All the family could say on repeat was, "He just needs a spanking." I was at odds with them all of the time, but I've never regretted my decisions to comfort him through it all while explaining how life works & my expectations of him. He has overcome very well with that approach.
09 Aug 23 by member: ZenusWarriorPrincess
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It really is lonely. No one seems to understand that some things are different and more difficult with him. His sensory issues dominate where a neurotypical person wouldn't struggle. "Just beat it outta him" I heard.... Yes. Traumatizing my son is a MUCH more effective way to get him to suppress his emotions and make him fearful of being who he is. I don't want a zombie, I want him to learn his emotions and discover what helps him center himself without relying on external forces to manage it, which I unintentionally did for 4 years. I had to silence oliver before his bio-dad got angry and started throwing shit at us, hard and soft, and yelling profanities.
09 Aug 23 by member: DAZEY_iz_Well
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My son is almost 40 and has Autism, he is nonverbal and my husband and I are his caregivers.I really feel for you. There are not many people who understand your path..they have absolutely no idea. Don't let them bother you...you're doing the best that you can and you need to be proud of yourself. Praying for you 🙏
09 Aug 23 by member: rcguenth
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My parents were not ready to raise a special needs child, but i ended up getting diagnosed in my mid-30s with autism spectrum disorder level 1 and Generalized Anxiety Disorder. And I am 42 now. I have issues with touch and sound my parents didn't understand, and still don't. You are doing the right thing, even if hubbie doesn't understand. AANE (Asperger/Autism Network) has support groups for parents of children with autism. You can schedule a free resource call and find out what days and times they have available. And hubbie can come with you.
09 Aug 23 by member: crstlgls
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I taught kindergarten and had many in the spectrum of Autism. I was fortunate that they were high functioning. I feel for you and don't really have advice but am sending lots of support. It's tough being a parent to a special needs child. 🩷🩷🩷🩷
09 Aug 23 by member: Diana 1234
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I'm sending you lots of prayers and Hugs because I'm sure this situation is overwhelming.
09 Aug 23 by member: buenitabishop
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I understand the feeling of being judged. It is only 'real' if you believe it, though. No one can judge you once you know what you are doing is coming from a place of love and understanding. People are not perfect. No one is perfect. And to accept him for who he is right now is the best. Love him. That is what he'll remember and that is what will make you proud of yourself 10 years from now.
09 Aug 23 by member: unity1234
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you are a good mom and I pray he does better with his behavior and finds good friends to encourage him! you too!
09 Aug 23 by member: blueeyedbabe61
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Sometimes marriages cannot survive special needs children. If your husband is being abusive (verbal and/or physical), then you and your son need to leave. Call 211 to find out what resources are available in your area. Or call 988, the national crisis hotline number.
09 Aug 23 by member: shirfleur 1
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Children with autism do not process information the same. They also can get HIGHLY UPSET if there “norm” is disrupted (taking away his tablet). Someone without autism could understand that’s a consequence and it’s not fun, but temporary. But, a child with autism might view it as just a traumatic experience that they can’t overcome and they might feel like that consequence might last forever. Especially depending on where they are on the spectrum.
I’m sorry no one talked to you. A lot of people just have no clue or experience with autism. Hang in there! 💜 You’re doing the best you can under very challenging circumstances. You don’t need their approval.
09 Aug 23 by member: StormsGirl
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A few weekends back I spent a couple of days with a 4yo autistic child. It certainly was an eye opener. I had not realised what a toll it takes on the parents and just how difficult interactions with the child (or lack thereof) can be. Unfortunately due to 3 years of covid and lockdowns, this child had little of the normal interactions that he would have with others his age. Kind of a double whammy. My heart goes out to you.
09 Aug 23 by member: Annisworkingonit
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So sorry you are not receiving the kind of support you need from family in meeting your sons needs ❤️
09 Aug 23 by member: ddrudd
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Kids! Mine are assholes most of the time and especially to me. Love what Stormsgirl said. Nobody knows how it is, judging is a reflection on the one judging. You are a loving mom, focus on self care bc you can't control the actions of others.
09 Aug 23 by member: Shannonthemom
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Dazey, Listen to your heart...you're doing a wonderful job...something most people couldn't do.
10 Aug 23 by member: rcguenth
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Even children who don't have autism/ADHD still have moments when they are not at their best. Most parents realize this and have empathy for what you are going through which is much more challenging than most of us have to deal with. Hugs.
10 Aug 23 by member: -MorticiaAddams
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Dazey, “”U”” are Loved and we support you in your journey to better health.
👏🏾I’m Praying for your Strength and your Peace from anyone or anything that is troubling you. We are here for you❤️🩹
10 Aug 23 by member: Alindsey83t
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I know exactly how you feel. I have a kiddo who is diagnosed as well. It’s hard to know how to always handle every situation. Sometimes I think maybe I should hold them accountable for their actions as with my other children but then I remember how it’s not so easy for them. Just know that you are a special mom because you are doing the job that your child needs and not the job based on the opinion of everyone else.
10 Aug 23 by member: mommyweightloss
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Yea!! Conscious Discipline has been a tremendous tool in helping him be accountable for his emotions and actions. Since it's hard to distinguish how others are feeling, bringing awareness to being able to read facial expressions helps. "Look at your brothers face. What does it look like he's feeling?"
11 Aug 23 by member: DAZEY_iz_Well
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