morkbee's Journal, 07 Sep 21

Oh No! I’m so sorry … You should be so proud of everything about yourself, including but not limited to your weight control efforts. Huge hug going your way! 💕 

『My personal thoughts』 Overweight = A state in which daily life is difficult due to constant strain on joints and internal organs. I think that "overweight" is a person in this state. The values of beauty vary from person to person. I think that the definition of health is "a condition that makes it difficult for people to get a mild illness such as a cold." If you want to change the body silhouette, you can definitely change it with diet and muscle training. The body silhouette does not change suddenly, but if you continue, everyone will definitely change. Let's go slowly.✨ ▽＜｜b✨ 

I honestly believe that the only opinion that counts is yours and yours alone. Dad’s are dad’s, they loves us but sometimes say really stupid things! Sit him down and please tell him how his comment made you feel. I bet he has absolutely no idea! 

As a parent myself I can attest that we say things sometimes, even when out of love, that don’t sound as we meant them. I’m sure his remarks were meant to be encouraging and supportive of your weight loss regime; but came across as a little bit tone deaf. 

Being a teenager is the hardest job on earth. So much pressure. To get good grades, work a part-time job, have healthy habits, athletic training, making the "right" friends...etc... Those pressures are enough to make anyone binge eat. Having these healthy habits that we are all trying so desperately to maintain gets us all. Telling your family that on your journey some days you are going to eat a cookie. and that is ok.. Because that is reality. Almost like Alcoholics Annoyomous... they say today I am not going to drink... day at a time.. We all know that there will be birthday parties, summer ice cream, and winter hot chocolate. The battle is having just one. and being in control. Good luck to you in the war. You are already succeeding because you are here... Congrats!!! 

I know comments like that are not helpful, and can have the opposite effect. I see obese (not you) women saying that in their years of growing up, when people recognized that they were getting overweight and just wanted them to be healthy and happy, it was comments like that that led them to eat even more. My question is, what would you rather your Dad say? What would help you to be a healthier weight ? I assume, since you are on FS that you are working on it, and that's fantastic, the first step! But what words of advice would you give to parents/friends of someone very overweight to encourage them to start losing without having the opposite effect?