Register
|
Sign In
Canada
Search:
Foods
Recipes
Fitness
Members
My Fatsecret
Foods
Recipes
Fitness
Community
Community
Members
WendyMaq
Journal
WendyMaq's Journal
WendyMaq's Profile
|
Weight History
6 to 10 of 207
Page:
Previous
1
2
3
4
5
6
...
Next
14 January 2021
My therapy homework last week was to notice when I am kind to myself. THEN I had to thank myself for being kind to me. It didn't happen often.
I thanked myself for doing yoga every day even though I hated nearly every moment. I am in so much physical pain and inflexible, and I don't know how to modify. (Really. If I did, would I have an eating disorder? LOL!) Been having chest pain since the end of Dec (costochondritis), so Doc sent me to Physical Therapy yesterday. PT asked me to stop with the 30 day program and find a gentle chair yoga. "You can't find that quiet place in your mind if your body is screaming." Point taken. (I also can't breathe because my ribs are stuck!) I'll be seeing PT twice a week for the next few months.
After my PT appointment, I went to the store to buy a sports bra. (This weight gain has me up in band size and THREE cup sizes!) I left with a sports bra, a black scarf (which I've been wanting for years), some driving gloves, and a black turtleneck sweater. I was genuinely pleased. I thanked myself for being generous and not making me feel guilty.
There are still many more moments where I berated myself, but I'm trying. Oh look... another opportunity:
Thank you for trying. I know it's hard.
Weight:
Lost so far:
Still to go:
Diet followed:
94.8 kg
8.3 kg
20.0 kg
Not Applicable
Add Comment
Losing 0.5 kg a Week
07 January 2021
My boss is back from maternity leave, which gave me some relief.
The Holidays are over, which gave me some relief.
Then my aunt died of a massive brain hemorrhage. *sigh*
My heart is heavy.
HOWEVER
I have had my first appointment with a therapist.
I have had my first appointment with a nutritionist.
I have started an in-home Yoga program and I'm six days into it.
I have hope.
Weight:
Lost so far:
Still to go:
Diet followed:
95.3 kg
7.8 kg
20.4 kg
Reasonably Well
(7 comments)
Gaining 0.3 kg a Week
10 December 2020
Well, it happened! I have an intake appointment with a center which specializes in eating disorders, post traumatic stress disorders, anxiety disorders, and depression. Yup... ticks all my boxes. Psychotherapy, Nutrition Counseling, Cognitive Behavioral Therapy, Body-Image Therapy, Stress Management, Trauma Recovery, EMDR, and more. Lots of work to be done. I'm terrified and relieved all at the same time. Is it Monday, yet?
Weight:
Lost so far:
Still to go:
Diet followed:
93.9 kg
9.2 kg
19.1 kg
Reasonably Well
Add Comment
Gaining 1.4 kg a Week
03 December 2020
I have been struggling. My regular doctor put me with his new intern for fresh eyes. First appointment she asked me to keep a food journal, but not so much to journal my intake. She wanted my emotions when I ate what I ate. FUUUDDGGE! (But I didn't say fudge.) Nailed it in one. Every time I put food in my mouth, I'm angry. Angry about having to eat (I don't have time for this). Angry because I'm not hungry, but I know I have to eat. Frustrated because I'm fat and berating myself for it. Realizing that the anorexia of my youth is still at play, but it probably has a different name now that I'm fat. During our 2nd visit, she confirmed I'm not eating enough and asked me to try to up my calories to 1500 a day. I tried, but I gained weight and freaked out. Despite understanding that I have lowered my metabolism by not nourishing my body, all the emotions and trauma I've stuffed down deep are threatening to explode out of me and it's all I can do to keep it together. My third visit was mostly spent apologizing for failing. I know I'm spiraling. I got past my own obstacles to reach out for help, and more obstacles are thrown in my path. I can't seem to get in with a therapist who specializes in eating disorders. I can't even get anyone to talk with me: all answering machines and website forms. Is it any wonder we have a mental health crisis in America?
Weight:
Lost so far:
Still to go:
Diet followed:
92.5 kg
10.5 kg
17.7 kg
Reasonably Well
Add Comment
Losing 0.1 kg a Week
10 November 2020
Weight:
Lost so far:
Still to go:
Diet followed:
92.7 kg
10.3 kg
17.9 kg
Reasonably Well
Add Comment
Gaining 0.4 kg a Week
WendyMaq's Weight History
View Complete History