Ms Elizabeth's Journal

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23 March 2023

I've been sick with the plague since Tuesday. It can't seem to decide if it's coming or going. Because of the chills and hot flashes, random narcolepsy, body aches (my hair hurts), and my sinuses hurting I have opted to not workout. I worked out Tuesday and I lost 6 hrs due to an extended pre-bedtime nap with a couch and the dog. The dog drooled in my hair.

I finally got to the point where I could do squats and not require the handicap bar in the bathroom to pee the next day. I imagine all of that will reset as soon as I don't feel like something that got run over by a truck.

Fitbit says I'm a sloth. I barely ate and I was still over because I didn't move yesterday. Technically I did move. I switched sides in my sleep and I hit the next button to skip the commercials while watching Judge Judy. Fitbit needs a plague button that accounts for the fact that I'm currently busy not dying. Just sayin..

17 March 2023

Getting healthy is exhausting. I'm logging like it's my job. I log my food in fitbit. I also log everything in my handy dandy notebook with EVERYTHING my day includes. I log when I ate it, what I ate, when I worked out, when I took my vitamins, when I was annoyed at work.. the only thing I'm not logging is when the dog farted.

Good news is I have been able to avoid vertigo attacks for a while by doing this. Bad news is I'm now official to notebooks, strange colored pens and logging things. I've had a strong desire to look up workout books and logs today. I think I have a serious addiction. Especially since I'm hiding all the logging from the boyfriend because I think he would think I'm crazy. Not that he doesn't already think I'm crazy but he doesn't need to know a new reason.

My new adventure is me getting back into weight training. I had to give up most of my workouts because of the health issues but I feel like I have it figured out enough to pick it back up. Plus the healthier I am the better I will be able live. The fun part is I'm still completely clueless. Every trainer, plan, app, etc. has a different idea of what someone should do. None of them seem to start at the "can't do a pushup and looks like a beached whale when doing situps" level. Where does one start when wanting to start slow and not kill themselves?

02 March 2023

Is it a sign you have a problem when you actively avoid your professional friend (therapist) and health coach? Apparently I had a phone meeting with one yesterday and another one tomorrow. It's not that anything is wrong I just don't like people anymore this week. Now that I write that out I probably should have talked to both of them. lol Oh well.

We went on vacation last week to Orlando and then came back home to CNY and it is a struggle! I felt spring/summer. I wore shorts! My toes were exposed. I wore my new flip flops. The fire ball appeared in the sky for 5 glorious days! Now? Now it's 32 degrees. My jeans are scratchy. My toes are suffocating in giant socks. There is a snow storm forecasted for tomorrow. Talk about seasonal sadness. I should have refused to get back in the car for the drive back. If I had laid out flat in a lounge chair next to the pool I don't think they could have gotten me back into the car. So I'm back and kind of disappointed that the seasons cannot be put on a timer that I dictate.

The other thing is I'm back to work. I manage people. This requires me to people with people I would otherwise avoid. Not going to lie.. yesterday I went to the bathroom and came back to one of them looking into my empty office. I hid behind the copier until they went away. Today one of them requested to move work off to someone else. I said no. They guessed it was ok since they didn't have anything else to do.... no words.

I'm going back into turtle mode until the sun reappears. I will not come back out until my toes can be exposed without frostbite. Until then I cannot people.

01 March 2023

I'm back.. again. In January I was diagnosed with Menieres disease. I'm still coming to terms with what that means. It's really a garbage term for I have vertigo and they don't know why and there is no cure. As part of finding my triggers and what sets off an attack I have to log like a mad woman which I've been doing in a paper notebook.. which I accidently gave to my new hire. Complete face plant. I'm not sure if I can ever look at the man in the eye again. Because of that I decided it was probably better to switch back to a virtual journal. Plus who knows. You guys might have advice for my new insane diet.

I need to keep my sodium under 2000 mg. I had to give up caffeine, chocolate, and limit alcohol. I can basically eat rice and oatmeal. Which for someone who did low carb is a complete lifestyle switch. I'm still trying to figure out how to do this. I had it somewhat under control before the kids spring break but now I have to reset again. Turns out mardi gras season at universal studios is not low sodium friendly.. then again I only live once so I went a little wild. Now I have to reset before I end up on the floor with the room spinning around me.

If I don't get right with myself and get on plan I have violent vertigo for 4-6 hours at a time. Every time I have a vertigo attack the hearing in my ear gets more damaged. Plus apparently there is no cure so I'd like to keep it at bay for as long as I can.

Does anyone else do low sodium? My taste buds are sobbing from the lack of flavor without salt.

08 November 2022

Since everyone seems to be giving up something this November like no shave November I've decided to hide my scale from myself and do No Weigh November. Because well.. I can't not shave but I can totally not weigh myself. If I didn't shave I would end up looking like bongo the circus chimp and well.. I like my boyfriend. I'd rather not compete for the hairiest legs. Plus I'm pretty sure he would win and I'd have that weird awkward leg hair that's missing patches and doesn't grow evenly. I have enough things I'm self conscious about. I don't need to add weirdly growing hair to my list.

It's been a whole week and I'm now forced to focus on how I feel rather than a number. It's forcing me to check off days I exercised and ate well vs did I gain a mysterious 5 lbs and have no idea why. Or did I lose 5 lbs for absolutely no reason? The scale god is now in permanent time out in the linen closet. Getting healthy doesn't have a number... BUT.. if I could get below 210 this month I would be happy and healthier.

Speaking of health. I'm currently playing a game of chicken. As of today I am drug free. I finished my last round of steroids yesterday that the doctor had me on to see if it would affect the vertigo I keep getting. So far I'm still upright. I'm hoping that eating healthier and getting that part of my life under control will help eliminate whatever is wrong with me. Who knows maybe I just have fat ears. Whatever it is I'm taking all of this as a sign from the universe that I should stop taking my health for granted. I should also stop eating like a toddler. My new plan is to not eat like a toddler and put healthy things in my face hole.


Ms Elizabeth's Weight History


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