I have been heavy all my life. I love food, love to cook and love to eat. When I wake its the first thing I think of and the last every day. I have tried every diet there is,(and yes I mean every) and I have had gastric bypass surgery and lap band surgery. The Bypass went beautifully in 1982 and I had 15 beautiful years of feeling beautiful and "light" but I knew the old fat girl was still in me. Waiting. And when I found out I couldn't have children and needed a hysterectomy in 2000 we tried adoption twice. Both failed (long story , very painful). So "fat girl" found a weak spot and punched her way thru. And little by little I gained back 100 of the 166 pounds that I lost Until TODAY. TODAY I really WANT to stop gaining. Today I really WANT to stop eating foods that are making me fat, and eating in ways that keep me fat. I am beautiful inside, but all I see when I look at myself is a double chin, bags under my eyes, a fat unattractive woman OLD woman, who would love to feel sexy and beautiful once again. I need to stop this leak before my life gets swept away in a flood of food and wasted time. I WANT you to help me. I want someone to be there and listen when I want to go out and get drive thru and tell me Yaya STOP it. But I want a place to get tabs on my intake and my output in exercise. Daily. And I did notice I made this all about food. Instead of telling you about the other me. the one I should concentrate on.