abbadabba's Journal, 19 Aug 10

You are indeed a fortunate woman to have friends who tell you the truth. It is exactly at times like this that we need honesty, need someone to help us see what really is instead of what we 'feel' it is. I am sad that you are going through this but I am so glad you have such good friends around you. I don't know if there would ever be a 'right' time to clean the basement ... divorce is a choice, death is not ... I think the grieving process is more complex with divorce. On the up side ... you are down to 156!!! LOL!!! Is that the silver lining in the cloud? Seriously though, do take care ... thanks for sharing you are in my thoughts. 

You are indeed a fortunate woman to have friends who tell you the truth. It is exactly at times like this that we need honesty, need someone to help us see what really is instead of what we 'feel' it is. I am sad that you are going through this but I am so glad you have such good friends around you. I don't know if there would ever be a 'right' time to clean the basement ... divorce is a choice, death is not ... I think the grieving process is more complex with divorce. On the up side ... you are down to 156!!! LOL!!! Is that the silver lining in the cloud? Seriously though, do take care ... thanks for sharing you are in my thoughts. 

Yes you are lucky to have those friends and I can relate to how you are feeling. We tend to only remember the good things and forget the bad. I guess perhaps it is natures way of shielding us. lol What you are missing I think is having male company to do things with..things you have been doing your whole life with someone. That is something that will take time. Some days will be better than others but you will get there. You are lucky to have wonderful friends. Cherish them. Take care Abba!! 

sorry you are feeling this way abba, i am glad you have people to support you though. you have come a long way and eventually you will wake up one moring with all of this mess truly in the past. have a great weekend buddy:) 

{{{{{{{{{{hugs}}}}}}}}}} I am so sorry you are hurting. I have been there myself. I think the Christmas ornaments were the worst-we had collected them on our vacations. Rather than souvenirs we bought ornaments whenever we traveled anywhere. Each was connected to a happy memory and it was so difficult seeing them and remembering all those good things and then trying to hold onto the reality of the situation rather than how I wanted things to be. Ugh. Enough on ME...just saying I can imagine and empathize with what you are going through. more {{{{{Hugs}}}}}}} I am so glad you have such dear friends!  

You are healing abba, the best medicine is time but, once you close a door behind you, try to leave it shut. Good Luck buddy, maybe treat yourself to something nice this weekend.  hugggs. 

Info is right - close the door of the past behind you regarding relationship issues and leave the door shut for good. You'll find if you do so that person or person(s) from your past will then no longer have any hold on you. It can be done. Don't live in the past. Start a new and better future. Have a good weekend, thanks for writing on my journal...  

It's so difficult not to open a Pandora's box and suddenly be reminded of the past. The terrible things we've been through can seem like heavy baggage, burdening us in unhealthy, deep ways as we try to move on. I'm so glad you are surrounded by your friends who can guide you through these hardships. I am proud of you for simply recognizing how much you are hurting and taking that one small step forward in this process. By simply expressing your sorrows you are beginning to release their hold on you. You are well on your way in this journey. One day, Abba, you will be able to separate yourself from this baggage, to SEE it instead of BEING it. With more and more time and honesty, you will gain some distance from the pain, see yourself as separate from what has happened, and begin anew. God bless you Abba. ((Hugs))